Breaking: Obama Not a “Fan” of God on Facebook

This entry was posted by harry s truman on Wednesday, July 29th, 2009 at 3:42 pm.

An O&B reader tipped us off to a news item that will no doubt dominate the airwaves for weeks, if not years, to come; it’s likely to even surpass the recent Michael Jackson Corpse-stravaganza in newsworthiness. Yes, something dreadful this way comes, and we’re proud to be the website to unleash it. So shocking is this development that it will surely result in the collapse of America’s moral center, leading to the paralysis of our folksy extremities. But such a revelation is necessary, even if it crushes this country’s spirit and buries the American Dream under a mound of rubble and cloud of asbestos, never to be resurrected by so many diligent Christian heroes.

Just to add some damning context, look at Ben Stein’s recent op-ed in American Spectator, where he notes that Americans “ignored Obama’s anti-white writings” prior to the 2008 election. Or view Pat Buchanan’s debate with Rachel Maddow (“white men built this country”), where he decries inevitable Supreme Court justice Sonya Sotomayor’s nomination as affirmative action, which is a form of white oppression. Or look at Glenn Beck’s any Republican’s rumination that Obama is “a racist” who “hates white people,” simply because he doesn’t prefer white people, as is the tradition in our country.

Okay, I hope you’re sitting down for this, because here’s the big news: Barack Obama’s Facebook page is not a Fan of God’s Facebook page. Still breathing? Good. If parallels are to be made, we can deduce that because Obama didn’t choose God to be his friend, he therefore hates God. As we all know, if you’ve been snubbed as a friend on Facebook, you might as well not exist. For Obama, God is dead.

To be fair, Facebook is a two-way street, and it’s worth noting that God is not a Fan of Obama either. This implicit disapproval of Obama by the Mighty Lord God serves as indisputable proof that our so-called president is not on the side of the angels. Hopefully Republicans can use this divine slight as proof of Obama’s sacrilegious Socialist tendencies, as well as evidence that there’s some real Rosemary’s Baby stuff going on here, wherein universal health care is the demon baby of devil worshipers and homosexuals, and Obama is Mia Farrow before Woody Allen got his hands on her.

There it is. Besides being an illegally immigrated, sacrilegious, Socialist, Satanic, and probably gay racist, and in addition to being a Muslim, Obama is a God-hating atheist. If you ask Pat Buchanan, though, the reason should be obvious: it’s because God is white.