Welcome to the first installment of Ask Owl & Bear, where you mere mortals get to interact with this website’s esteemed animalian contributors! Do you have questions about music, movies, politics, art, literature, or priapism? Ask away! No question or four-hour-long boner is too small. Enjoy!
Archive for the 'owlsayz' Category
The writers of Owl and Bear vs. Bill O’Reilly: our latest theme?
If you haven’t heard, Bill O’Reilly recently caught some flak for making a vaguely-racist comment about Barack Obama’s wife, Michelle. Someone called into his radio show and made comments indicating that she had an anger problem. O’Reilly insisted that they had to look into the facts more and, “I don’t want to go on a lynching party against Michelle Obama unless there’s evidence, hard facts, that say this is how the woman really feels.”
Owl: The Owl & The Bear contains zero grams of trans fat.
Bear: Therefore, it must be good for you!
Owl Sayz is your daily fortune cookie. Some of them are bad because we run out of ideas. Send us one of your own!
Bear: Let’s just say, for the sake of argument, that you’re a goddamn idiot and nobody likes you.
Owl: WTF!?!
Owl Sayz is your daily fortune cookie. Some of them are bad because we run out of ideas. Send us one of your own!
When I think about you I touch my stump. Ooh, I don’t want anybody else, oh no, oh no, oh no.
Owl Sayz is your daily fortune cookie. Some of them are bad because we run out of ideas. Send us one of your own!
News you won’t find anywhere else:
Britney Spears’ performance at the VMA awards was amazing. Her choreography was amazing and she lip-synched perfectly.
Owl Sayz is your daily fortune cookie. Some of them are bad because we run out of ideas. Send us one of your own!
Owl: Here’s a headline from today’s news: “Gay musician skewers presidential candidates.”
Bear: Do you think they mean that literally?
Owl: We can only hope.
Bear: Why are presidential candidates only ever metaphorically skewered?
Owl: I guess they want to keep it serious.
Owl Sayz is your daily fortune cookie. Some of them are bad because we run out of ideas. Send us one of your own!
“I am not gay, I never have been gay. Well, maybe once or twice.”
Owl Sayz is your daily fortune cookie. Some of them are bad because we run out of ideas. Send us one of your own!
Bear: Amy Winehouse! Amy Winehouse! Amy Winehouse! Amy Winehouse!
Owl: Who?
Bear: Beehive!
Owl: Yeah, alright.
Owl Sayz is your daily fortune cookie. Some of them are bad because we run out of ideas. Send us one of your own!
How many roads can a man walk down/before he’s totally fucking exhausted?
Owl Sayz is your daily fortune cookie. Some of them are bad because we run out of ideas. Send us one of your own!
Bear: AIM is sooooo college.
Owl: And gChat is so workplace.
Owl Sayz is your daily fortune cookie. Some of them are bad because we run out of ideas. Send us one of your own!
12.7 out of 10 kids seen at WalMart are fat.
Owl Sayz is your daily fortune cookie. Some of them are bad because we run out of ideas. Send us one of your own!
Oh, you’re so cute and too tan! I just want to baste you! Yes I do! Yyyess I do!
Owl Sayz is your daily fortune cookie. Some of them are bad because we run out of ideas. Send us one of your own!
The only good thing about Back to School is the fact that I get to spend more time waiting in lines (plotting murder).
Owl Sayz is your daily fortune cookie. Some of them are bad because we run out of ideas. Send us one of your own!
I don’t regularly blurt out gibberish–it’s called “speaking in tongues,” and you should try it!
Owl Sayz is your daily fortune cookie. Some of them are bad because we run out of ideas. Send us one of your own!
